Your world can crumble when you discover that somebody you trusted is unfaithful. The pain can be intense, complicated, and overwhelming, regardless of whether the betrayal occurred recently or has been going on for a long time.
It is normal to question anything – your relationship, your worth, as well as your ability to move ahead. Healing can be possible – even in the throes of heartbreak. It takes time, support and care to recover from an affair – whether you’re going through it all on your own or even beginning a brand new chapter by yourself.
MSRCC helps people and couples who are dealing with the consequences of infidelity. You don’t need to go through this by yourself.
The Emotional Impact of Cheating
Infidelity affects both people in the relationship, though often in very different ways.
For the betrayed partner, reactions may include:
- Shock and disbelief
- Grief over what was lost
- Anger, rage or emotional outbursts
- Feelings of humiliation, especially if others know
- A loss of trust and safety
- Anxiety or hypervigilance
- Difficulty sleeping, eating, or concentrating
The partner who cheated may feel:
- Deep guilt or regret
- Shame and self-blame
- Fear of being rejected or judged
- Confusion about why it happened
- Sadness about the hurt caused
Whether the affair was emotional, physical or both, the impact can shake the core of your relationship. What was once solid can suddenly feel uncertain. Healing starts with acknowledging just how painful and disorienting this can be, for both partners.
How to Get Over Infidelity: Finding Your Own Path
If you have been betrayed, your emotions may feel all over the place. One moment you might feel numb, and the next overwhelmed with grief or anger. This is normal.
Some steps that can help you begin healing from infidelity:
Let yourself feel
Suppressing your emotions might seem easier in the short term, but allowing space for sadness, confusion, and anger is essential to the healing process.
Avoid self-blame
Being cheated on is never your fault. It is okay to reflect on the relationship, but responsibility for the betrayal lies with the person who made that choice.
Set boundaries that support your healing
Whether that means taking space, limiting communication, or asking for certain information, you are allowed to prioritise your wellbeing.
Focus on what you need
Some people want answers. Others need time. Some choose to stay, and others to leave. There is no one right decision, only what feels right for you.
Be patient with yourself
Healing from infidelity is not a straight line. It may take time to rebuild trust, clarity or self-confidence, and that is okay.
Recovering from an Affair as a Couple
Some couples decide they want to try to rebuild after infidelity. This path is not easy, but many find that with the right support, their relationship can grow in new and honest ways and often be stronger.
Recovery as a couple includes:
Rebuilding trust slowly and consistently
Trust is not earned back through grand gestures, but through small, steady acts of honesty, openness and care.
Practising transparency
Creating a relationship that is built on honesty and transparency, irrespective of the difficult content. This requires conversations that are built on safety through openness.
Having difficult conversations
Talking about what happened, how it felt, and what comes next can be painful but necessary.
Mutual willingness to repair
Both partners need to be committed to growth and change, not just moving on quickly.
Seeking support together
Affair recovery counselling can help create a safe space to work through emotions, rebuild trust, and decide what a healthy future looks like for both of you. Research indicates that in order to successfully recover from infidelity, professional guidance is essential.
Healing from Infidelity as an Individual
Whether you stay in the relationship or not, individual healing is just as important.
You might find support in:
Journaling your emotions
Writing about what you are feeling can bring clarity and release.
Practising self-compassion
Speak to yourself with kindness. You are navigating something incredibly difficult.
Working through trauma responses
Infidelity can trigger past wounds. Therapy can help you recognise and manage these patterns with greater awareness.
Focusing on self-worth
Being cheated on can damage how you see yourself. Rebuilding confidence takes time, but it is possible.
Trying mindfulness or grounding tools
When thoughts feel intrusive or overwhelming, calming techniques can help bring you back to the present.
If you are struggling with these steps, our therapists at MSRCC can guide you through the emotional healing process with warmth and care.
When to Consider Professional Help
Infidelity can be incredibly isolating. If you feel stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure of what to do next, you do not have to keep carrying it alone. Research suggests professional intervention is essential in successful recovery from infidelity.
Professional support can help if:
- You are consumed by thoughts about the affair
- Communication between you and your partner keeps breaking down
- You feel unsure whether to stay or leave
- Your self-esteem or mental health has been affected
- You want to rebuild trust, but do not know how
Our affair recovery counselling offers a safe, confidential place to talk, reflect, and make decisions that support your wellbeing. Whether individually or as a couple, contact us to learn how therapy can help.
A Final Word: Healing Is Possible, No Matter the Outcome
If you are searching for how to get over cheating, wondering what recovering from an affair looks like, or just trying to start healing from infidelity, know that you are not alone, and you are not broken.
You may feel lost now, but many people find strength, clarity and even transformation on the other side of this pain. With time, support and the right tools, you can begin to feel like yourself again, whether that is within the relationship or beyond it.
MSRCC is here to walk beside you. If you are ready to take the first step, contact us today.d
